Married man David Letterman announced on the Late Show last Thursday that he was nearly extorted $2M because he bedded numerous female staffers.
Married man David Letterman announced on the Late Show last Thursday that he was nearly extorted $2M because he bedded numerous female staffers.
JOSHUA SMITH, 29, WILLIAMSBURG, BROOKLYN
What do you think about this story?
Maybe Dave Letterman’s marriage wasn’t going so well. Maybe he just wanted to find new life or something, you know?
Can adultery be justified?
Adultery can never be justified. If you’re married, you’re supposed to be happy.
Happily ever after?
Yeah, you’re supposed to know what you’re looking for.
What do you think about inter-workplace dating?
You can probably find the right person there, especially considering the economy nowadays.
Do you worry about personal details ever becoming public?
You should be careful of the people you collaborate with. They might be one way and then turn on you.
Is that why you raise imposing dogs?
Nah, I just love dogs, man.
BJORN BRODSKY, 25, GREAT NECK, QUEENS
What do you think?
I feel for Dave Letterman, man. I think it’s fucked up somebody would blackmail and blow him up. He went public about it and I respect him for that. The guy who tried to extort him will go to prison.
Do you think Jay Leno fans will take him in?
I don’t know about that, man.
Have you ever known someone who got blackmailed?
Yeah, I’ve known a few scenarios. I’m not going to name names but I know drug dealers who have been blackmailed for money or drugs.
How did it turn out for the extortionists?
They usually get their ass kicked.
Have you ever extorted somebody?
No, I believe in karma.
GEORGIE EVANS, 34, LOWER EAST SIDE, NEW YORK
I’ve successfully blackmailed somebody.
Oh?
I was working at this company where I was able to access this CEO’s emails. He was cheating on his wife with another executive’s secretary.
What were in the emails?
Really sexy stuff. They would also plan meetings and dates and shit. Definitely incriminating stuff your wife would divorce you over. We made a trip to the ATM and he made two withdrawals. I was able to get $3000 out of him. I’m fair. I didn’t get him divorced or anything.
That was your last day on the job, huh?
I knew I was going to get laid-off (three months later so did the entire company), so I figured now was the time to take advantage of that, right? I was 22—so fucking young! I couldn’t believe I did it. I had another friend at work who helped me and I took her out drinking. I didn’t break her off 50/50 because that was my cha-chas! I paid a couple month’s rent and didn’t work the rest of the summer.
Do you feel bad?
I don’t really know how to feel bad for somebody who makes $50,000 a month. What the fuck kind of problems could you possibly have? Maybe if your kid got killed or something, that would be a crisis-thing. But over money shit?
Can money solve problems?
Yeah, that’s why people are motivated to extort people—that’s why it’s covered under the RICO Act. You can’t buy happiness but you sure as hell can buy your way out of a lot of misery.
What kinds?
Debt. My millionaire aunt was so troubled about losing money in the stock market she recently hung herself in her bedroom closet. She had kids at home, ages five and seven. My uncle found her.
Will karma come back to bite you for your extortion?
I’m sure it already has [laughs].
This Word on the Street was much better than the other ones. They had too much crazy talk and not enough real talk.
HA! Dave looks like a fucker. Smart-ass charmer, PLAY-ON PLAYAH.
Karma took her teef!
What’s best is during the taping the audience didn’t know whether or not he was joking around. You can hear their awkward laughter. It’s awesome.
what the fuck is up with New Yorkers looking OLD AS SHIT?
these are KIDS and they look like fucking…………..I dont know what.
Good read… but… none of these people look homeless… is WOTS branching out?
I don’t think Dave ever had extra-marital affairs. Dunno, just my opinion. I mean, isn’t it obvious since he waited to get married until he was, like, 200 years old? You gotta find the scoop with Mrs. Letterman, man, thats where the real story is. If I come to NYC (gotta get out of MSP soon), can we work on this?
The third interviewee has never had a job. just made that up in her crazy head. good read anyway.
I was hoping Georgie was a dude. A flaming gay dude.
If Georgie is a girl: Georgie needs to stop listening to the Murmurs.
If Georgie is a guy: Georgie needs to stop listening to Peaches.
Nice to see interviews with some non-homeless. It’s cool that Georgie can speak in parentheses.
Yeah, this one is rad. I hadn’t heard about Letterman, so it’s also news to me.
I have found the new love of my life and her name is Georgie Evans.
Imposing dogs? Those little fellas look adorable… anyhow it’s better when you don’t interview homeless people. If I want to read nonsense I can just skip to the comments.