What was society’s original rationale for imprisoning its criminals? WELL, it literally dates back to the cavemen of about 13,000 BC…
What was society’s original rationale for imprisoning its criminals? WELL, it literally dates back to the cavemen of about 13,000 BC — if you’ve never heard Heinrich Schliemann’s theory on this, sit tight; it really explains a lot:
According to Schliemann, there were three significant cavemen who contributed to the foundation of imprisonment as a punitive construct: their names were Og, Grok, and Shaliqua Atkins.
Now, Og and Grok were one-dimensional Randian hunters and providers. They spent every waking hour working to deliver meat in order to feed their massive fucking village of whiny caveman bitches, who just sat around all day not producing anything and criticizing the way these guys were doing shit.
Og and Grok were only human. Sure they got ticked off at how ungrateful most of the lazy motherfuckers in their tribe were, but they were real men, and thus they didn’t let these fags’ whining deter them. Instead, they worked their fucking asses to the bone producing enough food and shelter and warmth for everyone in the stone cave complex to fucking survive.
As Schliemann explains, most cavemen in the tribe were little more than whiny ingrates, but at least they were peaceful ingrates. ONE cavewoman in the tribe however — Shaliqua Atkins — well, something in her brain chemistry made her incurably psychotic:
Shaliqua Atkins didn’t just bitch and moan like the rest of the pain-in-the-ass cavemen; SHE actually engaged in violent and insane behavior.
Whether it was the middle of the day or the middle of the night, she would do psychotic shit like go from house to house screaming and taking people’s food and throwing it at their cave walls. She’d go around taking shits on baby cavemen’s stone bassinets, punching cavemen in the face and the dick, and pulling hair, and smearing her own shit on her body and on other cavemen, and yelling at 3 AM when the productive guys were trying to get their crucial, crucial rest.
I think you see where I’m going: This predicament ushered in the infancy of imprisonment.
Now of course, Og and Grok didn’t actually put Shaliqua in a makeshift stone prison. Instead, they bashed her brains in with a makeshift stone hammer and killed her to death — that’s why I said it was the INFANCY of imprisonment.
The toddlerhood of imprisonment came when people discovered that instead of killing criminals, you could enslave them and make them do work for you forever. To do this, you needed somewhere for them to live so that they didn’t run away — and that place was called Jail.
(Only later, in the teenage years of imprisonment, did the notion surface that a crime’s severity should play a role in whether a criminal was killed or just put in jail. This development did not occur until people discovered Human Rights, which occurred at about the time that the first latte was invented.)
So the purpose of Jail — before political prisoners like pot smokers got lumped in and thrown in too — was this: To separate, without killing, people who would fuck up everyone else’s shit so long as they were ALIVE and FREE.
Here’s why I mention it:
I’ve just spent the last few hours reading about kidnapper Philip Garrido’s horrific shantyhouse of horrors.
As you might remember, I’ve been known to become slightly irrational whenever I hear about people doing harm to children. In this case though, I’ve had a few drinks, and I do think I’m in the right frame of mind to recommend to our courageous and black commander-in-chief a shift of policy:
It’s clear that the current system of IMPRISONMENT is not preventing “registered” sex offenders from committing further sexual crime. Prison isn’t what it used to be (i.e. Lifetime Slave Housing) and guys like Philip Garrido are often allowed back into the free world.
Like Shaliqua Atkins, sex offenders are tragic figures — they are human beings with crossed brain wires, and they will behave predictably while they are ALIVE and FREE.
I therefore propose the following:
WHEREAS sex offenders who harm children are operating solely under the influence of an incurable chemical imbalance and
WHEREAS there is at present time no pharmaceutical amelioration for said chemical imbalance and
UNTIL such time as modern science is able to deliver a chemical solution to this chemical problem…
First-time Sex Offenders must be given the following choice:
Castration or Death.
I’m not trying to be a dick: It’s a horrible position for THEM to be in, and it’s a horrible position for US to be put in. You think anyone wants the responsibility of telling a man that he has to give up his balls or his life? No one relishes that; on the contrary, the predicament will give NIGHTMARES to legislators, surgeons, and executioners alike.
But the tragic point is this: There is no such thing as rehabilitation for this kind of person. If you have the propensity to rape and kidnap little girls, you WILL EVENTUALLY DO IT, and do it, and do it again until someone kills you. Period.
Ergo, as Schliemann suggests, there should be no such thing as a “Registered” Sex Offender — the only place a Sex Offender should be “Registered” is with his surgeon, for post-op ball removal medical care.
I do feel horrible for them, because I’m convinced that theirs is a chemical problem and therefore, there but for the grace of god go we.
Nonetheless, it isn’t fair to risk children’s lives — to make even ONE girl go through the unimaginable Kafkaesque clown-suit dirty-bedding nightmare-hell that this poor California girl had to go through — all because some of us want to drink lattes and not face the fact that these child rapists are incurable, and simply need to die.
If this policy seems overly harsh to you, may I take the liberty of assuming that in fact you don’t have kids?
nutting them might work for some, but the real sickos would continue to fuck with kids in whatever way they could. get the victimless criminals out and stop running your prisons like a buisiness and you’d have room to lock up all the perverts in the world forever. end of problem.
I agree with the rage, obviously. I don’t think you really think they should have their nuts cut off – what should happen is that they should remain in jail forever.
This is a funny and “ironic” segue:
“Castration or Death.
I’m not trying to be a dick…”
This is why parents are fucking idiots. You’re all entirely too emotional to make any kind of decision ANY kind of decision.
You’re gonna go and cut a rapists dick off? So are you also going to cut a thief’s hands off? Yeah, do this and then keep criticizing the Muslim world, dipshit.
castration doesn’t work. check out the ideas of chloe madanes. the inability to think beyond their impotent rage is what stops most people from finding a solution.
Quality. There’s a lot I disagree with, mainly the racist use of a traditionally Afro-American name to denote a human being who engages negative social behavior. This is not a fair portrayal of that racial segment of modern American society. Otherwise, it’s well written and thought provoking. The tangent works by not being a tangent at all. 10.
This whole web site is horrifying and makes me nervous about our generation.
Yeah I bet you’d find a lot of support for the castration idea amongst “womyn’s” circles. Fuck you man. How’s about we try NOT dressing little girls like Carmen Electra after she’s gone without dick for a few days? Love the Electra by the way. Didn’t you yourself in a tweet ask us who the real perverts are in the whole Catholic school girl uniform scheme? You were right. It’s the motherfuckers who dress them that way in the first place! Get some pants on them girls!!!
I read some where about how they do this in the Ukraine I think, And they had a bunch of Ex-child molester that could volunteer for chemical castration to get out of jail sooner. these guys said they couldent stop molesting kids and after said procedure they could function. Couldn’t find a link though
Two Words:
Pervert Island
this post makes me nervous about my generation…
You might be drunk but that doesnt excuse you from writing boring regurgitated articles you ripped off from forum posts
nor does it excuse the fact that everyone in the comments is taking this totally seriously come on people this is public school level trolling
I’m Canadian, reasonably young and don’t have children and everyone I know, including myself, hopes this guy fucking dies.
Anyone who thinks this guy should still be alive is psychotic.
By the way, I love dicks
There was actually a castration society in 19th c. Russia. Rumor has it that a czar was even involved. They believed that by eliminating the sexual organ, and therefore the need to have sex, spiritual enlightenment could be attained. They were lame.
Anyways, totally agree with literally separating the proverbial “wheat from the chaff.” There’s a very good reason why the spaghetti penguin lives on the other side of the island far from the monarch penguin, if you know what I mean.
Are you people fucking serious? You can’t just kill people who commit crimes you don’t like. That mentality belongs in the middle ages. I’m not saying its not disgusting and that part of all of us don’t feel that we want a monster like this dead, but you cant be serious that you would actually want capital punishment for someone like this.
I wont even touch the castration portion, I think that must be a fucking joke.
Sure whatever cut the rapists junk off but what about people who get needlessly arrested for drunkenly pissing in public? Do you wanna put us in front of some negro/nazi death panel as well? Also, parents are responsible for the castration of our society. Overprotective, PC, wear-your-water-shoes, lawsuit filing bitches. Thanks for everything you cunts.
or you can sew pussies onto them so they can still go get fucked
death is 2 good 4 him. castration might not work. i support public live flaying…totes cereal 2.
Suppose you’re coming home on the train and there’s a hot young girl with perfectly manicured nails holding onto the railing and she sees you lookin and she’s all “ooh blognigger come back to my house with me and let’s fuck” and so you do it and then you find out she was 17 and three quarters. She accuses you of stautory rape and then you get your balls cut off. Remember that not everyone convicted of “rape” is actually a rapist.
i don’t think castration would help. the rapists would just take their aggression out on society in a different form, like beating the shit out of people. and pedophilia is more about power than it is about sex. a castrated pedophile would still want to assert his power over the weakest people in our society, children. so even if actual stops happening, we would have a bunch of pissed off psychos running around even more pissed off because they lost their balls.
i also know how to stop men raping women over the age of consent. it’s called, START LIKING IT SLUTS! but seriously, rape is about domination. if a woman consents to the rape and take the sexual experience into her own hands she is no longer being dominated and abused. the rapist gets less satisfaction and the woman feels less powerless
ps i am a woman
you can say that again.
and let’s not forget that the most monstrousy monsters are those who usually never get caught so just castrating the dumber, poorer ones isn’t much help in the grand scheme of things. that just makes the monstrousy monsters go “oooooh! what if i get caught!” and the bulge in their pants (or drip in their panties) stronger. it is the shame, secrecy and titillation of committing those types of crimes that gets that type off. you must address the shame, secrecy and rage, for they are what drive the behavior.
also: the complicit female partners who more often than not seem to be a factor in these secenarios. what the hell about them? let’s address those “whaaat? he had big tents with slaves in my back yard?” “huuuuuh, he had our daughter underground in a dungeon with four kids?? my word! how could a good wife have known such a thing!”
puh-fucking-lease.
great point dude! what about all those FEMALE teachers and therapists that molest young boys!?! ahhh, but we don’t want to castrate the pussy of any dirty little nympho, now do we? they make the fuckin world go round!
Those who are really dangerous are those who have power to be above the law so they can rape and kill children without any problem. We have to kill them all.
To make the claim that there are women rapists is like saying there are straight AIDS victims. It’s an absolute PC distortion and warping of reality.
my point was that sexual abuse in patriarchal societies, like most things, is a construct. our feelings, and victims’ ability to be “okay” afterwards, are all based on the current construct.
stupid fuck.
How ’bout instead of just castrating convicted child molesters, we castrate EVERYONE? I’m serious, hear me out. We set up sperm collection/storage facilities across the cuntry so when boys reach the right age their seed can be collected, labeled, and stored. You could have a special room in each high school where this is done several times over some period of time, and samples can be stored in different facilities that way if one facility is destroyed you still have some of everybody’s sperm left somewhere else. Then you castrate them, safely and without pain or discomfort. When they reach adulthood, they can still choose to have their sperm used to inseminate their wife and can raise a family. Think about how many problems this would solve. There would be far less rape, STDs, inbreeding, war, and any other shit usually caused by pecker misuse. Eunuch’s bodies produce less testosterone so they would be way more chill, and their lives wouldn’t be meaningless because they could still have kids, their own biological kids.
Castration won’t work because they can still rape by instrumentation.
How about we give people the choice to vote or breed, certainly not both. God you SB writers are simple…
PS. That Heinrich Schliemann setup was offensively weak
http://www.zimbio.com/The+50+Most+Infamous+Female+Teacher+Sex+Scandals/articles/7hrWhfmeIcL/50+Most+Infamous+Female+Teacher+Sex+Scandals
so are teenage girls just really good at keeping their mouths shut or does this shit not happen with female students and male teachers?
Good post. Kill em all.
Hey – I Live On Don Knotts Blvd. – are you for real??
Tjat’s the most disgusting thing I’ve seen on this website – and the bar is pretty high.
this is beyond retarded. why not just keep these people in prison if there is such a high risk of re-offending??!! also, restrictions on where sex offenders can live (ie not near schools) are ineffective (they can still go other places) and just force them into more rural areas, which is not something that makes me feel safer.
Why? Do you live on Don Knotts Blvd. too?
(they can get away with way more shit)
What about the sadists who keep molesting? Labotomies, that’s what
posters are lame; this idea rules; all criminals should be given respective choices (death vs hand off, death vs foot off, etc); fuck muslims though 100%.
You could give their nuts to dudes who lost theirs in an accident. I’m sure there’s a few involuntary enuchs out there who would love to blow a load again, even by way of a child molester’s sack.
Or sell ‘em to Matthew Barney for an art project.
Or graft them onto a mountain cat and have it make love to a human lady and start some kinda Island of Dr. Moreau scenario.
you could sell them to those hillbilly dudes that like to put fake balls on their trucks’ back fenders. if you taxed them, it might save the economy.
According to them other broads on this site castration didn’t stop MJ. I’m more for locking ‘em up until such time as their chemical imbalance can be cured. AKA Life w/ no parole, and I mean LIFE, not this 25 years shit.
What if a nigger has the propensity to do shit but hasn’t done shit yet? Like, “to make even ONE girl go through the…” and stuff.
I know I’m spinning a different thread but this got me thinking about how sometimes the state will release a prisoner rather than put up with the cost of providing that prisoner medical care, especially in the case of those seeking “end-of-life” care. Put ‘em out and let them die on their own death bed, I suppose.
For the state, it’s more expedient to put an inmate on house arrest rather than pay for their medical care, but if that inmate somehow causes more havoc out of the clink, then was that money really saved? Not even a last-rites type of situation, it could be something like a broken leg. Balance the medical bills against the cost of any future crimes this person may inflict upon society. Is it worth it?
I suspect the only way this ties in with original post is that it could apply to sex offenders, as well. Who are we to judge who’s no longer a threat and who is, or are we just trying to save some cash? Or maybe I’m full of loaded questions.
Peter Pauls “Pervert Island” idea is the best suggestion so far.
Set it up in Tasmania, that way most of the work is already done for you.
I don’t have kids and want to add that castration doesn’t always work I worked at a home for retard sex offenders most of them pedophiles all of them had been chemically castrated all of them where still very dangerous to children so in my opinion we should just kill them no choices just end the fucking cycle
Hey Blognigger. Im not sure if you’ll read this comment but they actually do your idea in the Netherlands and it works.
4 states in the US have passed laws allowing this. You’re on the cutting edge.
This really smart MD/PhD named Atul Gawande wrote an awesome article summing up the whole issue from both sides.
http://www.slate.com/id/2660/
P.S. The title of the post is hilarious.
@ Sal
Too bad that article is 12 years old.
Blognniger has a time machene.
@Vanessa
Have the ethical issues of chopping a dudes balls off have changed that much in 12 years?
@Vane$$a
‘”we don’t want to castrate the pussy of any dirty little nympho, now do we? they make the fuckin world go round!”"
For real?
It’s always interesting to hear parents complaining about the dangers they have to protect their children from when we all know that the vast majority of abuse comes from parents and other relatives.
protoclown is a kiddie fiddler.
hmmmm sounds like someone hasn’t educated themselves.
huh. looks like someone “self-educated” hasn’t changed the name field.
Oh shit Peterpaul – “Pervert Island”? Fuck yeah! Make that a reality show and we’re in serious business.
why marilyn moroe changed for strawberry when she was with michale jackson ?
i think the reason was not fascism by Denis Lavant .
michale should have known it by his naivety.
so i thnk it was happy end.
um, yeah @ sal & Vanessa,
in the past 12 years since that article they have found that castration may deal with the sex drive, but it does not deal with the obsession. So, they can’t get horny but they still think about it and can/will still act out in another harmful fashion. Think about it like this: Even if you couldn’t get a boner would you still find women/men attractive? And the answer is yes, you would. You just wouldn’t be able to fuck them with you’re dong. You would find a way though, wouldn’t you?
Permanent imprisonment or death is the only truly effective way.
RE: Pervert Island
Adam Carolla proposed that idea for a reality show a couple years ago, called it “Pedoph Isle”
Pretty good, no?
http://baseballblog.co.cc/?p=5787