This is JR Reabero. He says he makes $300 a day writing funny things on cardboard placards and waving them under strangers’ noses. If we give JR the weekends off, his annual
This is JR Reabero. He says he makes $300 a day writing funny things on cardboard placards and waving them under strangers’ noses. If we give JR the weekends off, his annual income is somewhere around $72,000. That’s the same as someone making $120,000 and paying taxes on it.
Then again, JR could by lying. He stunk to high heaven yet he seemed sober and lucid to me—if very tired. As JR spoke, he would slowly rake his scalp and flea-bitten shins with fingernails that appeared to have withstood the blasts of exploding pencils. He drew blood on several occasions, which he would casually inspect from under his nails before rubbing it into his tarry jeans.
So what’s a news story that’s got you thinking?
The gay marriage debate.
What’s your take?
I have a lot of friends who are, ah, gay, and I prefer to have the laws passed.
Which states now perform gay marriage?
I can’t remember precisely but there are about six states.
Let’s see. I counted Connecticut, Massachusetts, and Iowa, I believe.
Yep. Rhode Island is another.
Yeah? I don’t know.
Yeah. I think Florida passed theirs. California is on the verge of passing that.
It was legal for second in California.
They’re on the verge of passing it in Hawaii, too.
Where do you get your news? Newspapers, television, internet?
Word of mouth.
Is that the form of news your trust the most?
Yep.
Why’s that?
Because it’s true when a person says it.
But can’t people lie?
Nope. Not with me they don’t.
What if they didn’t know they were wrong? Like, maybe we mixed up one of those states back there. Maybe Iowa didn’t approve it.
I know for a fact Iowa did approve it, and so did Wyoming.
Wyoming?
Yep. They passed theirs four days ago.
Where did you find that out?
My hometown newspaper in Wyoming.
Oh, you’re from there. Does it seem odd that a state like Wyoming would be so progressive in granting gay people the right to marry?
Nope. There’s a lot there, so I’m used to it.
I’m surprised Iowa passed it so quickly.
I knew Iowa would pass it from the beginning.
How’s that?
There’s a lot there, too. I got friends in Iowa. In Boise.
That’s in Idaho.
I can’t remember many towns. It’s the biggest town—
–Des Moines?
Yeah. I got about 32 friends there.
Why do you estimate 32 instead of 31 or 33?
I know ‘em all. I used to live there.
What are their names?
Robert. Shelton. Lisa. Terrine. Jenny. Annie. Maria. Carla.
[I count these names on my fingers. Two college-age girls approach and hand JR folded dollar bills.]
Thank you. Kissy. Melissa.
That’s ten.
Cheryl. April. John. Mike. Danny. JR. There’s a couple JRs. There’re six Johns.
OK, so that’s 17 plus… All right, we’re at 23. I want to see you make it to 32. I guess you could just make up names and I wouldn’t know.
Naw, I’m not making them up. Pamela. Michael. Roger. Brian.
Five more.
Christina. Christie.
Three more.
Sara. Jake. The last one uses a weird name. Yen.
Like Japanese currency?
Yep.
That’s 32. Can you think of any more Iowans?
Nope. I just know those guys. I used to live in Boise.
That’s in Idaho.
Oh. Des Moines. I’m half awake/half asleep right now.
Where did you sleep last night?
On the street.
Is there a safe place you like to go?
Not really.
What’s some criteria for a good place to sleep?
Me? Anywhere.
Do you prefer a stray mattress or a bed of cardboard?
Blankets.
How much money do you get a day?
Not very much.
What’s a good day?
The average is about $300.
A day?
Yeah. I’m good with what I do. I’m the only one who’s got these types of signs.
So how do you not have an apartment if you have such a good living?
I’ve got three kids: JR, Red, and Melissa.
Are you still in touch with the mother of your children?
Nope. My children are back in California. Los Angeles. I’ve lived all over the United States. Every single state.
Hawaii, too?
Yep, in Honolulu. That’s a good place. But it’s boring there.
It’s good for boogie-boarding.
I bodysurfed.
I could never figure that out. I could never keep my head above water or keep my body straight.
[JR begins thumbing through a wad of singles]
What’s a good body surfing technique? You know, for people just starting out.
Keep your head above the water. That’s the best advice I can give you.
That seems kind of obvious.
I’m very tired.
How much money do you send home to your kids?
All of it.
But you must take a little off the top for food and a room, right?
That’s what I do. I get a room on the West Side.
Is there a shelter there?
Nope. It’s a room in a run-down building they turned into a hotel. It’s $40 a night, but I used to date the owner’s daughter, so they give me a room for $20.
Was that a while ago you dated her? Have you lived in the city a long time?
Yeah. I’ve been here almost 14 years now.
Why do you stay here?
I like it here. I make money here. It’s better to do this than anywhere else. I’ve been given hundred-dollar bills, 20s, 50s, tens, fives. I make money out here.
What trades have you worked in?
All different types.
Is this the most lucrative trade you’ve got?
This is the best one I got.
I’m the only one who does the funny signs in this town, and people love me. Even in bars. They’ll come out and smoke a cigarette, read my signs, and they’ll say “you’re the best one we’ve got out here.” Each month I do about 800 photos. I make my signs different every day. They call me the sexy playboy.
Let’s see. So on average, that’s going to be about–
–A dollar a photo. That’s about 300 a day.
Three hundred photos a day?
Yep.
Let’s see. How many hours are you up and about each day?
I’m up from eight o’clock in the morning until two in the morning.
OK. So that’s 18 hours a day. You make $300 a day… but that’s just photo money. People also give you money without taking photos. So you’ve been up since eight—
–I’m up to $150 already.
Dang. So you’re not hungry. You probably ate something already.
I already had chicken, fries, and coleslaw.
Did you get a cold beer with that?
Nope. I don’t drink.
Any substances?
Nope. I gotta get out of here. I’m running late.
All right. You want a soda or anything? I’ve only got a 20. But you can probably break a 20.
You give me five and I can get that hotel room.
No.
Hey Peter Madsen, where do you hang out, i’d like to shatter your fucking teeth a pint glass.
throw a with between teeth and a pint glass,
thanks
‘member the homeless guy conversation regarding hand jobs to trannies for warm and/or dry sack time? that ended this shit. boooooooooooorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrinnnnnnnggggggggggg.
i used to fly signs, i’d get like $100 a day (if i was lucky) and usually some weed. that was outside of a concert after everybody is all fucked up and feeling generous. my regular sign was “will hold sign for money”, everyone thought that was so clever. i got called out a lot on it though, because i was too lazy to hold it up for very long. i’d just let it lean against my pack or a sleeping dog. some pasty fat guy with a mustache would walk by occasionally and turn to his kids and say “he ain’t even holdin’ the FAWKIN THENG!” and guffaw and shit.
come on, no “bummer” (as in into gay sex) jokes
possibly the most loathsome piece i’ve read on here to date.
Wow, baiting the homeless. Brave.
[...] because he lives in the Hispanic boonies (i.e. Bushwick). He likes asking people about their dicks, tricks, etc. email: [...]
@anonymous
Did you stop because you realized how pathetic you were? Or are you still a sad sack?
i’ve seen this guy around. he scares the shit out of me. and you are correct: he smells like an abortion.
[...] talked him into wearing his suit at noontime in Union Square in 90-degree heat to mimic the pose of JR, our beggar from a couple months ago. He said he was getting sweaty as balls, but he soldiered right through [...]