Are you tired that your partner’s ass tastes like bean sprouts and his crotch smells like tofu? Would you prefer that veganism stay in the kitchen and out of the bedroom?
Are you tired that your partner’s ass tastes like bean sprouts and his crotch smells like tofu? Would you prefer that veganism stay in the kitchen and out of the bedroom? Would you like to add something a little more red-blooded, American, and artery-clogging to your sex play?
Then pick yerself up a fat greasy tube of Baconlube, a pork-scented personal lubricant that will make your crotch and poop chute smell like a sizzlin’ pan full of fried hog fat on a cold winter’s morning.
Baconlube is especially helpful if your partner has “morning crotch” but can’t control their urges while the coffee’s still brewing. Slather some Baconlube on that mess, and you almost—almost—won’t be able to tell the difference between your lover’s genitals and a crackling-hot plate of delicious salted pork strips.
We eagerly await their Wafflelube and Pancakelube flavors.
-JENÉE
People like you are the reason God doesn’t talk to us anymore.
um, gross.
Yap!
Great! This is going to be Maxim with more curses. Gavin, what have you wrought.
directions for homemade baconlube:put an entire package of bacon strips in the oven at 400 degrees fahrenheit for half an hour. Remove bacon from oven. Put bacon grease in fridge to cool off. while the bacon grease is cooling enjoy your bacon and daydream about what’s to follow later once your honey come home.
if you’re stretched for time, use olive oil (or any other vegetable oil)
you’re welcome!
muslims and bacon lube make my cock rock.
cool- sbtvc is reddit now!
Gavin is allowing this because you guys have been too mean to Luke. We love you, Luke.
Well look at that. An unfunny piece, about an unfunny product.
I’m not gonna write Jenee off because of one post, but as posts go, this was the worst. And to debut with that, come awn
gavin, dump this bitch now.
Jenée tries too hard.
Baconlube and ass sweat. Perfect for that “fucking in the bathroom at White Tower” vibe.
You could have just provided the link to the bacon lube and photo and spared us your self amused antics. You suck, you horse faced clitoris.
Why can’t I post bacunt?
Hey she’s earning her 22K per year kids. Let her alone, let her be.
more boobs JenÉe
Politics is so stooooopid. We want beeewbs! Guy stuff! Hhhhaasrghhhhhhg !
This was funny why? “Oh, look, you guys! Someone stupid made a dumb product, so it’s up to me, the editor, to meta-mock it so I can feel A) smart when I’m around the hipsters, and B) hip when I’m back at law school. Fucking win/win, niggaz!”
New angle?
hilarious lube.. but I don’t read streetboners for average blog shit, jenees boring (and fuck, who picks a pseudonym that requires an accent?)
Jenée, if you want to be taken seriously, it’s time to start writing under a different name . . .
ebaum’s world
why aint women truthful to mens about crotch smell huh. its like onion pits or weekwearin crap da butthole smear and masterbation buildup or cheese putrified shoe sox slob feet even, wats up? you don’t pick your boogers when i aint looking? your dumps smell like roses?
why oh why should these odors be turned elsewhere when fucking is all about the real rawness. i can make a bacon condom anyole day if you don’t want that butter batter in yah. yeah, I’m a sharp dressed man for day an night pussy and you know i get down and dirty but what you expect? get up at 4am and lather soap and shit for you?. well, who thang is this
or is you sayin women’s want the waffle dicks and pancake dicks as supposed the grits and gravy. wats wrong with the barnyard buster.
its just that morning dust is real jelly sum times. you wanna wake up all cuddly an shit like the sunshine white and blue robins tweeting in your sprinkly bliss
nuthin doin, turn the fence of tides kuz the crow shits on both sides of da fence
if you ant me to fuk you like a wheelbarrow into the cracker barrel of ole yonder, just gotta yell my name.
say baybe clean that ass like redd foxx and i stumble over to the sink and use the joy, if that’ll make you happy
jenee, you need to understand this is no shortcut to performing your womanly duties
The above post is really bad, and feels like Jenee was saving this one for emergencies when she became head of the blog in case her other stuff didn’t look funny.
She’s not even being made fun of for how unfortunate her posts are, it’s quiet avoidance because no one wants to tell her how bad it is, not even Gavin. They and I are hoping things will improve. Good luck, and there’s no pride to considering “falling back” on law.
This isn’t Jezebel Jenee.
i want the other guy back, i dont even remember his name, but im not liking any of these posts or edits …sorry to be mean, but this shit has been shit these past few days since the switcheroo