Aside from legitimizing the running man as the go-to dance move of the early ’90s, MC Hammer’s other great career accomplishment was going bankrupt.
(Photo by MC Ty from his forthcoming album Please Hardaway, Don’t Hurt ‘Em)
Aside from legitimizing the running man as the go-to dance move of the early ’90s, MC Hammer’s other great career accomplishment was going bankrupt. It shocked everyone at the time but looking back it makes perfect sense; he was rolling with a massive entourage, financing parties for a swarm of beggars and hangers on and living life like a Rock Star, always glad to pick up the tab.
When you’re rich your family tree tends to grow a few extra branches and in the early ’90s, everyone was Hammer’s cousin. If you were black and lived in the Bay Area between 1990 and 1993 odds are Hammer bought you dinner and a 40 oz at least once. How bad was he being drained? At one point it was reported that his posse of yes men and wannabes was costing him $500,000 a month to maintain. This didn’t seem to worry anybody though because everyone alive in 1990 knew with certainty that people would always wear baggy pants and do the running man at clubs, so the money would always be there. Still, financing these freeloaders was one of Hammer’s major downfalls.
His other downfall was being too legit to oversee his personal finances. He entrusted his money to the ghetto’s version of high-risk Wall St. investment bankers and thought that because he loved Jesus, everything would work itself out. By 1996 not only was he broke but he had accrued debts totaling $13 million. Worst of all: No one was doing the running man anymore.
Waxing philosophically about his bankruptcy for an interview in Ebony magazine, Hammer succinctly described the problem : “My priorities were out of order.”
Hold that thought.
By now everyone knows American Apparel is on the verge of bankruptcy. This also seemed inconceivable at one point and people are trying to find definitive explanations of what went wrong. My free-market-loving friends, who think that the Enron tragedy was the result of too much regulation and oversight, already have the answer: They believe the company was trying to force morality into the market by making sweatshop-free clothing and the vertically-integrated business model was their downfall. I couldn’t disagree more.
I think the only reason American Apparel had any traction with consumers was precisely because of the fact they adopted an outdated, but morally preferable, business model that appealed to liberal humanitarians.It’s the only way to explain why, in the beginning, someone would want to buy one of their blank shirts for $20 instead of just copping Basics by Hanes for $5. They successfully differentiated their product by making it the official Sweatshop Free™ option, thus appealing to the ethical concerns of an emerging demographic of socially conscious consumers while also catering to the fantasies of anyone who ever wanted to look like a gay Miami Vice extra.
So how have they failed? Here’s my theory….
I’ve never met Dov Charney, but from everything I’ve read he seems like someone I’d like to hang out with. He’s honest enough to admit that he likes fucking hot young women (some of whom are reportedly his staff), he decorates our streets with the only advertising I can consistently jerk off to and, above all else, he appears to have a sense of humor. He sounds like a great Rock Star and a terrible CEO.
Charney isn’t suffering from the exact same problems that cut down MC Hammer, but over the last few years his priorities have always come across like this:
Being a Rock Star > Everything Else
Everything he’s done to give his company an edgy, fashionable image has simultaneously made him more famous as an eccentric CEO and more disliked by the core consumer base his company depends upon. If the company fails, it’ll be because of mismanagement and nothing else. I could list the numerous problems already facing American Apparel that have been covered extensively by Gawker but I’m not here to do that; I’m here to force an analogy between a humiliated ’90s pop culture icon and a rich, aging hipster Jew who likes to fuck teens. I digress….
Charney is his own worst enemy right now and the longer he refuses to acknowledge that selling some of his stake in American Apparel and stepping aside as CEO is the best business move for the company, the longer he’ll continue choosing to be a Rock Star instead of a prudent CEO. And as we all should have learned in the parable of Hammer: Gotta get your priorities straight, son.
Bankruptcy? I question his Jewish roots.
“It’s the only way to explain why, in the beginning, someone would want to buy one of their blank shirts for $20 instead of just copping Basics by Hanes for $5.”
nope. eight years ago, you feel that shirt compared to the $5 piece of shit, and you’d buy it no matter how poor you are- doubly so if you’re a hipster, and quadruple this for loosey lefties- but mostly it was the quality.
What’s up with the whole roughly ten or less anemic paragraphs constituting a fiscal/political/theological/(insert another complex theme here) treatise kind of posts by authors with monikers such as, The Fool, Arv, Ty, etc. plaguing this site for the last year or so? Are penis anecdotes & fart and/or booby jokes ever going to take back their rightful seat in the pantheon of SBTVC or am I just RSS’ing this shit for zero fucking reason?
This is good.
Holy crap this is news to me. Guess I’m not hipster enough.
I better stock up before they go belly up.
“No one was doing the running man anymore.” That is funny.
I just took stock: Pink American Apparel poplin wallet? Check. Matching father/daughter organic cotton T-shirts? Check. Shit brown track jacket? Check. I did my part for Dov (and, yeah, let’s hang out), but hell no did I buy “The Funky Headhunter.” Sorry, Hammer, but your priorities got fucked, dawg.
Great article. I think partly why they were popular at the beginning too is that bands were using their shirts for merch. Every show I went to between 2004 and 2006 was all american apparel shirts.
A lot of the lefties who suppoted AA got pretty bent about the ads and sexual harrassment. I still do the running man btw. enjoyed this too.
my signature move is doing the running man in a pair of shiny AA leggings
^^@ poopus, great comment, I can see it doing double duty over at the concurrently running ASK BARF AND GAVIN: WHAT ARE SMART ARTSY GIRLS INTO?
I hope i can fuck teens when Im in my 40s.
Oh wait did this article have a message?
Am I the only one that realized that while reading an article about how Dov totally Delorian’d his company, this web site is actively running ads for him?
this site is so asleep at the switch, it’ll be running these AA ads long after the planet has been evacuated. oh, wait the planet is already evacuating–wetly, on our fappy heads.
Dov is super hot
His biggest mistake has been cutting down on the “NEON-SUPER 80′S SUPER-SLUTT” clothes. (GOODTHING)
And moving on to “(IRONIC?) DIANNE KEATON NERD-GIRL” shit they’re trying to sell now.
(NOT GOOD)
So websites are not allowed to run advertisements from companies they are occasionally critical of? I don’t think you’re thinking that one through.
i got tired of propping up some perverts fantasy. back 5$ haines for me.
dov can by a mag like the rest of us.
I love how people criticize American Apparel when it basically did the impossible: Bring manufacturing jobs BACK to America. While the Right is bitching about Big Government forcing business to outsource jobs and the Left denounces Third World manufacturing as exploitative, Dov managed to combine the best of capitalism and bleeding heart liberalism to create something that thrived, was socially conscious and pretty much defined fashion for the last five years.
The problem with pursuing a good idea and doing it well while not adhering to strict ideological bullshit is that dogmatic idiots on both sides try to piss on you. They don’t like you thinking for yourself, much less succeeding.
I get this isn’t what you’re saying Fool, but people who shit on American Apparel for being overpriced will never be happy:
“Oh, you get your clothes from a thrift store? You’re co-opting working class culture, you trust-fund baby.”
“Oh, you buy overpriced stuff from Supreme? You’re a dumb mark.”
“Oh, you buy clothes from Urban Outfitters? You’re a corporate whore.”
“Oh, you buy shirts from American Apparel because of their morally defensible production? You’re stupid for paying $20 for a T-shirt.”
Bottom line: Fashion critics are schizophrenic assholes.
It doesn’t matter when all your employees are illegals imi’s. Same shit, different place. Plus their market got saturated with brands (Target, UrbanOutfitters, H&M, Faggot Inc., Etc.) who had no trouble having AA’s most popular items produced (ring spun tee’s, melange colors, and basic ass hoodys that fit slightly better) for 1/100th of the price and retailing for 1/3 of the price of AA. I’m sure the CEO is a turd, but he did create it and it did work for a while. He pretty much just failed to adapt or failed to see that it would be inevitable for his product to be recreated by literally EVERYONE else. It happens, but I bet 95% of AA’s customers don’t give a fuck about Dan Cheney, or even know who the dud is. Shit was destined to tank, shoulda sold out, nigs would have been set for life – BOING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
you wear clothes? how pretentious.
@ Dude – That was the message
@ Gnarles – I promise I will write about dicks next week.
I thought that American Apparel made hammer pants.
I like how people with paper routes are discussing the economic ins and outs of a company worth hundreds of millions. You guys couldn’t run a muffin shop let alone an international chain.
I have no idea why or even if AA is doing bad. When you get to those kinds of numbers, it becomes magic math I don’t understand. Companies that lose 250m are often worth ten x gross. Out of my league.
The big picture is that Dov started something huge and did it ethically which is something about 1 in 100 companies even bother to try doing. @Haters Gon’ Hate summed it up nicely. Worry about your own shit.
My dick is so small…wait, what post is this?
First, as an AA shareholder, thank you for writing about the brand and keeping it relevant. Second, Dov, if you read this, please don’t sell any stock. Third, fuck you Gawker. Fourth, I’ll throw my two cents in on the balance sheet: Rapid, leverage-fueled expansion followed by an unprecedented collapse in consumer spending and continued high unemployment; loosing 2/3 of your skilled workforce to an immigration sting doesn’t help margins either. Fifth, keep up the good work fellas, don’t let me down. Sixth, remember those Sasha Grey Ads? Fuck. When was the last time Hanes did something like that for your dick. Now get out there and buy some fucking Piqué Raglan Pullovers or Deastock Watches you ingrates.
like someone else on here said before, sasha greys eyes are dead, i hate it.
^^^ Amen zab judah. AA = Sasha Grey. Haines = Black Hitler.
What Dov did with AA was so easy that any one of us could’ve done it.
Since we didn’t, I guess that means we all hate the idea of fucking 19-year-old tens and having millions of dollars plus jets and free clothes.
Who knew?
Thanx SB commenters! I learn something new everyday.
I hate on Dov because I secretly wish he would fuck me in my gaping asshole whilst fondling my balls. Beautiful teen girls are icky btw.
I don’t care what some Jew does with his dick and his company.
@beef haha agreed.
This is a sound, well investigated report and demonstrates a deep understanding of the market.
@Gavin
yaaa man i feel you. its just as annoying as reading political articles written by a guy that pitches tv shows and runs a fashion blog.
You don’t need to be a market expert to know that when a company’s shares go from $14 to $1.50 its bad. When no one wants to keep your books anymore cause they’re so all over the place that’s bad.
What the article says is basically the same thing youre hearing every where and thats cause if you know business its just common sense. When investors think the CEO is unstable the best move is to step aside. Its why Steve Jobs stepped aside before his health could become an issue. Thats what you do when you care about the company more than being the face of the company. And everyone went thru the same recession btw.
I admire what Dov is doing. I don’t think anyone is against him for his vision and if they are they are too cynical to be believed. It doesn’t mean though that he maybe gets it wrong some time. I hope they pull thru.
zab is right w/ “rapid, leverage-fueled expansion”
am appy starbucks themselves by building out too many retail locations as their brand peaked.
Y’all is missing the entire fuckin’ point on why American Apparel is bombing harder than Tiffany’s Come Back Tour: They don’t have a good product anymore.
Yeah, their stuff is all made in America. Great. I love buying first world nation made goods. I love buying overpriced fashion stuff made in Japanese textile mills, Scottish wool sweaters, etc etc… But they are in no way anywhere near the quality control that reflects their prices. T-shirts are pretty hard to fuck up, and I like them still, but with their new attempts into “american basics” are horrible. Go into an actual american apparel now and you see these ugly ugly poly-twill, poorly made trousers and shirts, vile thrift store selections (california select? GET RID OF IT!) that have holes in them while hanging up. It’s like they seem to “get” the fact that they’re not sustainable on t-shirts and hoodies forever, but can’t manage to make a better product that someone is willing to spend their money on.
Their staffing policies are also dire. Every bit of anecdotal evidence I’ve had from “non-cool dude” sources is that they’re aloof, poorly managed, unintelligent, and completely disorganized, and I’m in total agreement. Get a hold of your staff, Dov!
This is all in addition to their way too many locations, and poorly thought out placement. For example; in Boston, which is a pretty small place, they have two stores on the same street, about 4 blocks away! Durrrrrr….
What would I do? Shut down any unprofitable stores. Hire better designers. Get better fabrics. Figure out better quality control standards. Crack down on the staff to be more professional. Focus on your good products that you still have!
Maybe I’m just being pedantic but I still like them kind of, I just always end up empty handed when walking out.
Dov i a waste of life. He rapes his employees and pays no one shit. Long live the American dream.