Posted by
Drew Grant
• 11.12.09 11:00 am


How do I know if I jack off too much? I know masturbation is normal and stuff but I wonder how much is too much.

How do I know if I jack off too much? I know masturbation is normal and stuff but I wonder how much is too much. When I was in high school, a friend of mine bragged about how he did it eight times in one day, and we were all impressed. One day, I stayed home from school and decided to go for it, and I went back to school the next day real proud of 11. Since then, I’ve shattered that record with 21. If it makes me seem less pathetic, I’m in a long-distance relationship, but it might not. For all I know, 21 might be the standard for a lot of guys (like husbands, lol), so yeah, would you know anything about this?

Do guys really worry about this? I mean, I’m sure there is a period of adolescence when religious or parental guilt makes you wonder if your thingie is going to turn black and fall off, but hell, I was almost kicked out of school in 3rd grade for rubbing my crotch through my jeans, and I never thought I had a problem.

I guess there’s a thing called Gratification Disorder (because I saw it on House and they called it that), where parents think kids are having epileptic fits but really they are just cumming in their little Pampers. And if it feels good at such an early age, the only way you can “overdo” it is by repressing your natural instincts for years and years until you just … I don’t know, pop or something.

Then again, I’d say if you were spanking it so much that you were getting blisters or chaffing, then you should probably lay off for awhile. But you’ve got a better chance at getting a nasty sore from fucking some random chick you met at a bar to blow off steam after a long day than you do from going home, lighting some scented candles, and jerking it to bestiality erotica (or whatever you’re into).

-DREW GRANT

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Comments
  1. Joe Queer says:

    You can certainly overjack, so that when you go to war with the snatch you arrive with an empty gun. Bad news!

  2. Richard Nixon says:

    Truer words never came out a queer’s mouth.

  3. !!! says:

    i think if you’re up to 21 times a day, the problem is less that you’re masturbating too much and more that you’re not doing anything else with your time. it’s like smoking weed all day.

  4. Sir Fagsalot says:

    What else is there to do but smoke weed and jack it?

  5. beefbalones says:

    Norman Mailer: Well, it doesn’t lead to it instantly. People can jerk off all their lives and they’re not going to go insane. I said the ultimate tendency of masturbation is insanity. … My point, however, is that left to itself masturbation doesn’t bring you back into the world, it drives you further out of the world. You don’t have the objective correlative.

  6. stoops says:

    i heard wacking off lots is good for your prostate. wack away, hombre.

  7. Kennedy says:

    I am trying to impregnate my wife, so she is steady milking me at home. This leaves me scarce opportunities to masturbate during the 10 days of fertility she claims monthly. I def enjoy fucking my wife, but 10 days of missionary, ass-elevated fertilization sex gets boring if I can’t “cheat” on her with a little pron fap. Shucks!

  8. Uncle Wah Wah says:

    If you end up getting carpal tunnel from doing it like old Rummy here, you know you’ve gone to the well one too many times.

  9. SinnerMan says:

    There is something that is lost during a “nut”. The Chinese call it jing. There was a time when male sexuality was valued and preserved. Now being a succubus is the easiest job ever.


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