I’m having a problem with a couple of my best friends. Thing is I’m still in highschool, my town sucks, I want a new life and such. Lately I’ve been losing alot of friends we just get into arguments then we don’t talk to each other anymore.
I’m having a problem with a couple of my best friends. Thing is I’m still in highschool, my town sucks, I want a new life and such. Lately I’ve been losing alot of friends we just get into arguments then we don’t talk to each other anymore. And the friends I’m still pretty much friends with we don’t have as much fun as we used to. If we hang out I usually have more fun talking to their boyfriends than them. I feel totally guilty about it, but what should I do to make the situation better? I know everyone in highschool doesn’t stay friends forever out of highschool but I’m just a junior and if I lose these friends I won’t feel like making new ones. Plus I really do love my best friends!! Things have been awkward lately. What do you think I should do? Stop being friends with everyone or just grin and bare it til next year graduation? I’m a big fan of yours so your opinion really matters to me. 
)
Muchh Love,
Ana
Dear Ana,
The bad news is I know just how you feel and guess what? This shit doesn’t end after high school. For the rest of your life you will go through a period of hating your friends and feeling like they hate you, back and forth forever and ever, just like pooping in someones butt hole. It’s just normal relationship stuff. We get moody, and the closer we become with people, the more nit-picky we get. The good news is that by this time next week, you will feel totally different. Don’t make any grand decisions like “I hereby declare our friendship over!” That’s dumb. None of this shit is written in stone, it’s all fleeting and intangible, relationships ebb and flow and run their own course. If you need to take a time out, then do it. Focus on yourself in a positive way rather than let other people determine how you feel about yourself. Get obsessed with some new shit; learn Tarot, get a tattoo, get into a weird band, start a clip art collection, hang out with your family, consider taking up smoking… these are just a few things we do to preoccupy ourselves while we have to feel our feelings rather than act out on them. I’m in the same boat dude. It made me go to the gym and research Homeopathy just for shits n gigs. Another amazing activity is helping other people. Do the dishes for your mom, visit or call your grandma, when you go to the cafeteria and see a nerd sitting alone, go sit with her. This is the ballsier thing to do but it works so good. Most people are preoccupied with themselves 99% of the time, so I doubt your friends are giving that much of a shit about you and who cares cuz you’ll never know. Try controlling what you can: your actions. And make them good. The rest will unfold as it’s supposed to, and it will be great. You’ll see. And PS obviously your friends are gonna be pissed at you, you’re hanging out with their boyfriends! Why are you doing that? Ask yourself honestly if you have a hidden vagenda.
xx
Arfin
Surprised at the good advice, except a tattoo could be worse than “any grand decisions like “I hereby declare our friendship over!””.
sound advice.
Someone’s been watching Me and You and Everyone We Know
WHEN EVERYONE YOU KNOW SEEMS TO BE A TOTAL ASSHOLE, YOU’RE THE ASSHOLE.
This is the exact opposite advice if it were guy in the same situation. I’m not sayin I’m just saying.
PS – did u work at Lerner associates doing cold calls in high school? Were we kinda friends or was that someone else. kthxbai
where’s the requisite picture with Chloe Sevigny? I feel robbed.
Good film reference
good advice
good post!
I like Leslie so much more now that she goes out with Machine.
I wish when I was in high school, someone told me that time goes faster as you get older, and everything that you feel like is going to last forever, doesn’t.
PS I know this would be “tough loving” type advice for a teenager, but maybe “trying to be independent” (ie, lesley’s advice) should be less of a “distraction” between friend-spats and more of an outlook on life generally. All the constant distraction from one’s own ultimate solitude will eventually make you boring to boys who get tired of hearing about all the things you want to buy, or your ex-boyfriends, or your flighty plans that you never end up following up on.
real talk? shine those losers and find your own grind. the world will work it’s way back to you. or not. but either way, you’ll know when it happens. or doesn’t.
thanks Lesley, it has been for mutherfuckin ever since we got one of these gems, I’ve been dealing with the terrible mimickery of “Dear Drew” so this advice was muy nice. Maybe you could give her some tips on how to not be such a try hard?
this is some great advice! helping people gives me a total self esteem boner
Yeah, this is sound advice which is exemplified by “Dear Drew” — much like a hot chick standing next to her ugly best friend.
ME YOU AND EVERYONE WE KNOW IS A FILM FOR FUCKING WANNEBEE ARTSYFAGGOTS
“you poop into my butthole n i poop into yr butthole” is the only good line in the movie.
Miranda July is proof that a lot of women directors deepthroat.
(with the exception of Sofia Coppolla)
First scene: Man sets hand on fire screaming OH HAI DIZ IZ AN INDIEEE FILM LOLOLZZ
Also, Drew is fucking hilarious [at]whiners suck don’t diss her ima fuk u up.
Sumbody Gon Git Pregnant = Drew
lulz
Only girls do that weird bullshit where they get bummed on each other for a couple weeks, and then they’re friends again, and then they’re not, and then they are, and on and on ad nauseam.
I have punched some of my best friends in the face, and then had beers the next night on more than one occasion.
Your advice is fairly sound, yet this post is boriiiinn….. snnnzzzzzzzzz…….zzz
[...] Arfin Published: Tuesday, 7 April 2009 Comment E-mail Facebook Digg Permalink A few years ago Street Carnage blessed me with my own advice column. I don’t know dick about dick but it sure is nice pretending [...]
@ drippy dog dix and cum bubbles or something: and then you ate soooo many nachos and hit on soooo many chicks and won soooo many football games and did soooo much stuff in your biiiiig huuuuuuge truuuuuuuck. girls punch each other in the face, too. except it really hurts ’cause of all these rings.
also, me you and everyone we know was cute. miranda july is probably the most earnest person alive, whether or not she deep throats, youse knows she means thats shits. whoopie!
^ Are u mocking nachos, chicks, football and trucks? Are u from dumb europe or am I just hearing this in the rong tone?
“Arfin Published: Tuesday, 7 April 2009 Comment E-mail Facebook Digg Permalink A few years ago Street Carnage blessed me with my own advice column. I don’t know dick about dick but it sure is nice pretending”
Does this mean Drew is fired from pretending she knows about dicks? Or that now two girls are going to be pretending they know?
@ the original: You cunt! You totally nailed me, consider me put in my place. Ouch!!!
Vroom, Vroom! Screeeeechhh!!! Honk, Honk! Do you hear that? It’s me out front picking you up for our date. Quit Twittering® about what a whore your “Best Friend” is and get down here! There’s a kegger down the way, I just got the new Trapt CD, and I’m ready to Rawk!!!
Impossible to read this because you don’t push the fucking return key!!!
Use spaces and paragraphs, are you an IDIOT?? Who are you the short circuit robot who can read the yellow pages in 2 minutes with no spaces?? Input! Innnput!
Fuck you and get a spacebar and carriage return crank from macy’s thx
Dear Barf,
You forgot to tell her this only applies to girls. They are bitchy and whiny and fight all the time and then get back together and they are best friends again. Total hypocrites. Boys/Men don’t do that stupid shit. Not the cool ones at least. Girls shouldn’t either. I might not be gay if they weren’t. Your advice is shit. Barf-Face. Think before you write.
Now you are FUCKING TALKING cum rong! We’ll have a gay ol’ time! Your parent’s bedroom or mine?
um. highschools is quite the lamest time ever, why question shit then?
wait until you get to college and then the real friends start, who in the fuck still hangs with people they went to highschool with, its lame, you are forced to be friends because of circumstance.
This only applies to chicks. I don’t know a single guy who has these problems.
I’ve been best friends with the same duders I met in highschool. We went to college together and we still hang out. I’m sorry you guys met shitty people in highschool, or maybe you’re just shitty people.
dear christi
boys are worse. you stupit.
It’s a work. So fake and like not even doing a good job of disguising it.
Seriously, I have no concept of this conundrom because I have an average pair of balls and an average sized penis. In other words, I’m an average dude. Average dudes do not go through this shit.
O SNAPZ!!!
Christi Bradnox VS Lesley Arfin Street Carnage CAT BRAWL-AGE!!!
Taking bets now. 100 on Bradknockers? 50 on Barfin? Either way, it’s gon’ get sexxxy.
i have more respect for lesley after reading her advice
Oh Christi and I have been frienemies for ages now.
you should join your local roller derby team (when you turn 18), and if you don’t have one you should start one.
watch hell on wheels…get a bit of perspective about the sport and then go for it. i am in the process of starting a team in my little city. you will not worry about this “friend” stuff because you’ll be too busy spaghetti wrestling.
What kind of fargin icehole doesn’t like their friends?
that cutie gavin is EL-P. HE MAKES DOVES CRY.
THINK ABOUT IT
If anyones still reading this thread see if can guess what age level this one was written. I’ll give you a hint, it was definitely above 20.
Actually, that last email did offend me. It offended me so bad I
didn’t see a need to write back to you because I don’t want to remain
friends with you. I did not find that email humorous. You bashed
someone I care about (that you don’t even know) with stupid
stereotypes. Besides, I guess I was looking for a more sincere, happy
response. Maybe I was hoping you would be happy that I’m happy. Now
I know that it’s absolutely impossible for you to be considerate, it
worries me that keeping in touch with you will just keep pissing me
off. If I can’t openly share with you what’s going on in my life, I
think our friendship kinda stays at a superficial level.
Hey. Who’s stealing my name? I see. That must be how you deal with rebels around here.
I think that Gavin is brilliant. I love how he’s smart enough to post HIS funny stuff alongside this absolute shite. He’s already funny, but standing next to this Arfin lady makes him seem a thousand times funnier. These are the types of moves that define success in places like Hollywood, academia, and Wall Street. He should be very successful someday soon.